The Croat card player - a ballad
I know a skilful little man, by name of Crumbly-Pilchard. He spends his days upon the baize and nights he fumbles Richard He is a wizard with his Dick, though hearts don't always break We gaze amazed at his great length and wish he'd down his stake A boy should know, a boy should learn that though he may have skill, the enemies he makes in life can kick him till he's shrill Don't target me, O little man or I will rhyme you sore, and every time I see your mug I'll come and kick you more