The Songstone

Becky Binz-Comely was having an awful day . It was that time of the month; Christmas was over; it was pissing down and freezing; the delayed train was steaming with sodden, standing commuters.  Becky did what any well-brought-up young lady from Penge would do: she abused a near-minimum-wage oik in a cheap polyester uniform. 'You there...'. It was only a hundred years from Passchendaele, when great grandmama had sat, crocheted, suffraged and sang ' We don't want to lose you, but ...'. Becky was very proud of her heritage.   This oik was not cannon-fodder, though: imagine Becky's chagrin when he did not cringe; imagine her horror when he actually answered back! 'Honey'!   Becky was outraged. Becky was appalled. The struggle for women's rights was far from over. Had great-grandmama suffraged for this? Until a young, very well-brought-up female graduate could be heard in respectful silence, until her entirely justified complaints were met with

Farewell the Philippines, what can one write of pata, beaches, beauties every night? Needs must recover quick! Back to 广东 and Sanying Spa Resort, where weary schlong can longer bathe in waters nature's blessed and Rooster year seen in by broody rest A place of peace and quiet in this great nation enlivened by amusing mistranslation

  Delicious sinful unctuous pata yar!

You know it's not a major route when your plane's like this

3000 metres up. Effective oxygen 14%; important to control your breathing here. Not quite Tibet; as close as I can go, travelling alone. The largest prayer wheel in the world. I don't approve of superstition... Seems to keep the locals happy though, and tourists flocking in. Harmless enough, I s'pose.        

Time to move on. A bus to Tiger Leaping Gorge, one of the world's great sights; photos can't do it justice, but I took some anyway. A word of caution: having taken thirty minutes getting down, I scornfully refused the easier path back up... To cut a gruesome tale short, I entered Tina's Guesthouse on a horse, exhausted and my wallet light. Still, at least I made the bus to Shangri-La.